In formal Japanese settings, crossing your legs signals disrespect and casualness. The proper sitting position is seiza (正座) - kneeling with feet tucked under - or sitting straight with both feet flat on the floor. This applies during business meetings, traditional ceremonies, tea ceremonies, and when visiting temples or shrines. The rule stems from centuries of Japanese culture where body positioning reflects your respect for others and the situation. Men typically sit with feet slightly apart, women with ankles together. Breaking this rule won't end the world, but it marks you as someone who doesn't understand Japanese social codes.

Quick essentials

• Keep both feet on the floor during formal situations
• Seiza (kneeling) remains the most respectful position in traditional settings
• Men can sit with feet slightly apart, women should keep ankles together
• Crossed legs suggest you're treating a formal situation casually

FAQ

When exactly counts as "formal" in Japan?

Business meetings, job interviews, meeting elderly relatives, temple visits, tea ceremonies, traditional restaurants with tatami floors, and any situation involving ceremonial elements.

What if seiza hurts my legs?

Start with short periods. Many Japanese people struggle with seiza too. In some modern settings, sitting cross-legged (agura) might be acceptable for men, but ask first.

Do Japanese people always follow this rule?

Younger generations bend the rules in casual settings, but they switch to proper posture when formality increases. Context reading matters more than rigid adherence.

What about chairs versus floor sitting?

Floor sitting (especially tatami) demands stricter posture rules. Chairs allow more flexibility, but formal meetings still require both feet down.

How do I know if I can relax my posture?

Watch your host or the most senior person present. When they shift to casual positioning, you can usually follow their lead.

What's the biggest mistake foreigners make?

Assuming one posture works everywhere. Japanese etiquette shifts with context, relationship dynamics, and generational factors.

Related Japanese terms

• Seiza (正座) - formal kneeling position
• Agura (胡座) - cross-legged sitting
• Tatami (畳) - traditional floor mats
• Zabuton (座布団) - floor cushions
• Reigi (礼儀) - etiquette and manners

The deeper picture

Historical roots

Japanese sitting etiquette traces back to the Heian period (794-1185). Court nobles developed elaborate posture codes to display refinement and respect. Crossed legs suggested laziness or disregard for social hierarchy.

Samurai culture reinforced these rules. Proper sitting allowed quick movement if conflict arose. Crossed legs meant vulnerability, poor discipline.

Modern applications

Business contexts

• Job interviews demand perfect posture
• Client meetings require awareness of generational differences
• International companies blend Japanese and Western norms

Traditional settings

• Tea ceremony follows strict seiza protocols
• Temple visits expect respectful positioning
• Traditional ryokan (inns) maintain classical standards

Social situations

• Family gatherings with grandparents
• Formal dinner parties
• Cultural events and festivals

Practical navigation

For beginners:

Start with short seiza sessions at home. Build leg strength gradually. Many Japanese people use small portable stools for extended seiza.

Reading the room:

Watch others before sitting. Age dynamics matter - older people expect more formality. Regional differences exist too. Tokyo business culture differs from Kyoto traditional settings.

Recovery strategies:

Made the mistake already? Shift quietly to proper position. Don't announce the correction. Most Japanese people appreciate the effort to adjust.

Physical limitations:

Communicate respectfully about knee problems or back issues. Most hosts offer alternatives like chairs or back support. Honesty works better than struggling silently.

The rule isn't about physical perfection. It demonstrates cultural awareness and respect for the situation's gravity.